We’re gonna try a new column here on Hands of Cement. During any particular Predators’ game, our thumbs are on fire as we text back and forth about the play on the ice, the lousy commercials or the gaffs made by the tv & radio guys. We thought you might like to be in on the conversation, albeit a day or two late. Since we’re primarily writing to hockey fans, we also thought you might need a legend so you can keep up with the conversation…
k: blues signed wellwood from europe. has to clear waivers. nothing would make me happier than stealing another player from them even if its just to scratch him.
n: kyle wellwood? i didn’t even know he was in europe. we should claim him and trade him…
k: ilya kovalchuk is -29 this season.
n: i almost feel bad for jason arnott.
preds first goal (preds 1, wild 0):
n: (after sending k a picture of my first Guinness float) you’re craving a guinness float like leggy’s craving his second goal. 1-0 preds off the stick of LOLegwand.
after mikko koivu scored for the wild (preds 1, wild 1):
n: koivu just made 3/5 of our powerplay unit look like a bunch of retarded blind kids. and by that i mean it’s 1-1.
after nick spaling’s first goal of the night (preds 3, wild 1):
n: nick spaling is a man on fire! 3 goals in 42 games. 3-1 preds.
k: Spals to the Wall
n: another sign for the road trip (note: we’re going to the preds/bj’s game on feb 22.)
k: can we do LOLegwand?
n: i don’t think people would understand that it’s an LOL of LOLove.
a few minutes later:
n: i think cellblock303 read your mind…they just tweeted Spals to the Wall.
after nick spaling’s second goal of the night, emphatically signaled by the ref (preds 4, wild 1):
n: i love it when the ref swings the hammer. I SEE THE PUCK!!! I SWING THE HAMMER!!!
k: if spaling gets a hat trick i will twitpic my nipple on PredFans
after marcel goc (rhymes with crotch, so that’s what we call him) scored to make it 5-1 preds:
k: that was a crotch rocket.
n: my heart gets so happy when we beat the hell out of other teams.
After Pekka stretches out to make a sick save:
n: when stretch armstrong was a child he dreamed of having pekka’s range of motion. and the wild announcers are being rather homo-erotic in their discussion of pekka’s size.
Preds 5, Wild 1. Nice 60 minute effort by the Preds. They totally dominated the Wild, whose announcers scoffed at our snow storm, lusted after our goalie, and mispronounced our players’ names. Maybe they’re just jealous of our new NHL Guardian.
By the way, I mentioned this on Twitter earlier tonight, and would love some feedback. I’m a little disappointed the league gave a southern-based hockey team’s super hero a power that involves spitting. Am I overthinking things?